Tomorrow, you will not eat turkey. You will stand at the dining room table and raise your fist, you will lower it with a mighty bang. You will say, “In the name of Posh, I refuse to adhere to this pointless tradition of mass bird murdering.” You will then pick up a heaping spoonfull of potatoes and drop it into your pants saying “This is what I think about that.”Â Â .. <– really, go ahead, make your day at least somewhat entertaining for me. Better yet, use the day to reflect on all the reasons WHY you’re thankful to have me to serve, and celebrate the transition from ‘fall’ into “OMG ITS A WHOLE MONTH WHERE I CAN BUY GIFTS FOR MY GODDESS AND NOT HAVE TO MAKE EXCUSES TO THE WIFE”- because as you know the HOLIDAYS are here.
And what is it that I especially love about this time of year? Why, the commerialism of it! Isn’t that what we have all come to love? The fake santa’s (and the real ones 😉 ), theÂ charities, greeting cards, special edition books/cd’s/dvd’s, theÂ sudden ability to spend three times the amount of money you have- its just all so damnÂ spectacular.
But don’t worry my little Elves, I willÂ find a way for you to experience the real Magic of the Holidays. Â Mmm hmm, do you really think I’d let a commerical holiday pass me by without capitalizing on it? hahaha. So go ahead and reflect on the year- were you a good enough Posh puppet, or did you fail miserably? You have one month left to make it up, and then we’re off to the races- a new decade is right around the corner.
About some other important news, Don has been allowed a few days of sanity – he pretty much believes that he is safe from my power right now. Do I have any volunteers that would like to explain to Don why he isn’t safe yet?
“You are the weakness i fight every day.Â You are the voice in my head that seduces me to slavery.Â You are the epitomy of arousal and cruel manipulation.Â i hurt for Your touch, Your abuse, Your mockery and scorn.Â i dream about You and i cannot stop lusting for You despite the destruction You have wrought”- Oh paul, you’ll have to get more orginal than this if you expect me to allow you access to the clips you crave so much.